Thursday, April 9, 2009

true beauty

This was my post in response to Wifey and her friends calling me a fat cow and mooing at me, yet mooing, because that is mature. (they all work at Hooters and felt the need to lash out at me for her husband and I ever having a relationship...in College, like 6 years ago!)




True Beauty Current mood: strong
Beauty: 1. the quality attributed to whatever pleases or satisfies in certain ways, as by line, color, form, texture, proportion, rhythmic motion, tone, etc., or by behavior, attitude, etc. 2. a thing having this quality 3. good looks

Vain: 1. having no real value or significance; worthless, empty, idle, hollow 2. having or showing an excessively high regard for one's self; looks, possessions, ability, etc. 3. lacking in sense; foolish

Shallow: lacking depth of character, intellect, or meaning; superficial

Uncouth: uncultured, crude, boorish

It amazes me that even being near the age of 30, an age that one would consider an adult, girls, not women, still resolve to junior high tactics. You feel threatened, you lash out in the only way that you know how-you play the fat card. The only problem with this is that it doesn't bother me. I grew up with a good understanding of my body-I knew at a young age that I wasn't going to be a "skinny" girl. I was well aware of that, when, in junior high I already had a C, almost D, bra cup and wore a size 9. It did not bother me. It did not stop me from doing the things that I wanted to do. I was a cheerleader, living in a world of size "0's" and eating disorders-oh well-didn't bother me a bit. I never felt different, I never felt outcast, I never felt threatened, least of all, I never felt fat. God blessed me with the body I have and I love it, every inch. It seems that some people can't understand how men would be attracted to me. I've never been the drop dead gorgeous girl that had random guys asking her out, instead, I am the cute girl that once you get to know, becomes more and more attractive. It's called a personality. The benefit of this, I didn't go out on too many dates with douche bags who only based their opinion of me on my looks. The drop dead gorgeous girls seem threatened by me-I don't understand it. If you are so beautiful, why would I be a threat? It shows how shallow some people can be-when they can't look past themselves and their stage in life to understand what others have to give and what makes them attractive to others. It is easy to lash out at the person you don't know and blame them for your problems, rather than look at the person you love and truly see them as the person they are. It takes more courage and understanding to get to know that person and find out what that person has that makes them the amazing, unique individual that they are. When Kevin and I split, I was devastated. The simplest thing for me to do was lash out. I learned from my mistakes. I made it a point to get to know the other girl-I wanted to know what he found so attractive in her. It didn't take me long to see what he saw-she is truly a beautiful person, inside and out, and I was lucky and got a great friendship out of it. We developed a mutual respect for each other. We saw what he saw in each of us. So if you think that I am going to feel threatened or hurt by petty, quick-to-judge, junior high tactics, you honestly don't know me. You don't know how strong I am. You don't know that I have more self love than most people have for another person. I don't feel the need to defend myself for what happened, it is the past, get over it. I don't feel the need to apologize in any way, shape, or form. The only thing that I learned from this is that more times than not, beauty truly lies only on the outer appearance. Superficial people lack the depth to see beyond outward appearances, so in turn, they use the only tactics that they know because they have nothing else to use. Look outside yourself and your small world, pull yourself off your pedestal, and look at the big picture. What is the true definition of beauty? Ask yourself that question. Then ask yourself if you got the full story.

2 comments:

  1. you are having a rough time all around. that sucks, and i'm sorry you're going thru all this.

    also, someone who works at HOOTERS has no place to make fun of someone who doesn't.

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  2. I second Lora's Hooters comment.

    This was very well said, and I totally agree. Personality is what makes someone truly beautiful. The whores that say stupid shit are just jealous because they have to rely on their looks to get them places.

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